Updated: Mar 29, 2020
Reasons why I haven't started this blog yet...
I’ve been thinking about starting this blog for a long time – years actually – but I keep putting it off.
One reason for my delay is time – there’s never enough time to do the things we want, the things we know we should do. Even when I do find the time, usually I’m just too tired. I just want to relax and watch TV or read a book. I don’t want to put any more effort into anything, even if it is something I know I want in the long run.
Another big reason I’ve been putting this off is because I didn’t have a name for the blog. Such a small and silly thing, but I just couldn’t start without it. I felt like I needed the right name – the right brand – to really get my blog off the ground. Thanks to a brainstorm session with my friend Annie, the name “Burpees and Burritos” finally came to me.
Finding the name helped me realize what this blog was actually going to focus on. And that realization led me to the thing that was holding me back the most:
The feeling that I’m not enough.
I’m not fit enough. I don’t work out enough. I’m not strong enough, skinny enough, healthy enough. I didn’t feel “good enough” to start a health and fitness blog. When the name “Burpees and Burritos” came to me, I realized that this blog isn’t going to be about giving fitness advice and healthy recipes (although I might do that too). More importantly, it’s about my journey of finding balance in my life. It’s about learning to love exercise and healthy eating, while also allowing myself to enjoy the things I love – even if they’re not always the healthiest choices.
At the beginning of 2014, I was 175lbs – according to the BMI scale: obese. In late 2015, I was down to 115lbs, the thinnest I’d ever been in my adult life. Too thin, maybe. I stopped getting my period. Family members started getting worried that might have an eating disorder.
Now, early 2020, I am back up to almost 140. I’m still exercising, but not as much as I used to, and I’ve started falling back into old eating habits.
Because of that – because I’m not happy with my body and the way I’ve been “slipping,” – I’ve been delaying starting this blog. But I've come to realize that I don’t have to be an expert. I’m not a professional nutritionist or a personal trainer who's here to give people tips on how to get their healthiest fittest “bod.” I’m just me, trying to find balance, taking it one day at a time. That's what this blog is going to be about. It’s about the burpees, but it’s also about the burritos, and finding happiness somewhere in the middle.